# Say the Hard Thing – Rands in Repose

<http://randsinrepose.com/archives/say-the-hard-thing/>

- Host: [randsinrepose.com](https://links.thingelstad.xyz/hosts/randsinrepose.com/)
- Saved: June 14, 2018 (2018-06-14T11:33:21Z)
- Record: https://links.thingelstad.xyz/links/939ecd4e2ec4/
- JSON: https://links.thingelstad.xyz/links/939ecd4e2ec4.json

## What Jamie wrote

Some very practical and useful suggestions for giving and receiving candid feedback. 

> Your goal in life is to make feedback in all directions no big deal. You and your team never start in this state, they earn it. They start with small spoken observations that slowly turn into more useful feedback. They watch to see if each other are listening to the feedback and eventually acting on it.3 Once everyone has seen that feedback is both shared and acted on, they begin to feel more comfortable sharing large, more complex, and harder feedback. Why? Trust.

This sentiment definitely resonated with me.

> We exacerbate the problem because we don’t want to say the hard thing because we have the same voice in our head telling them, “It would be hard for me to hear this, so I don’t want to say it.”

It’s hard to give and get candid feedback. I tend to think we all feel we are better at it than we are. Leaders particularly have to focus on this __all the time__.

## Facts

- Kind: [Page](https://links.thingelstad.xyz/kinds/page/)

## Appears in

- [WT58: Weekly Thing #58 / Jun 16, 2018](https://weekly.thingelstad.com/archive/58/), Featured Links 🏅

## Same host

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- [The 2018 Emoji Report — Rands in Repose](https://links.thingelstad.xyz/links/0b5cd20ee080/) (randsinrepose.com, January 6, 2019)

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## Elsewhere

- Wayback Machine: https://web.archive.org/web/*/http://randsinrepose.com/archives/say-the-hard-thing/